Tag Archives: freedom

My thoughts on relationships…and how to keep one

Standard

To my loyal readers… I have missed you!  Sorry that I have been gone for so long… I have been through quite a few things over the past year.  Some good… some bad… some sad but turned into better.  I logged into my blog for the first time last  night in, I guess a year… and found that I still had readers… I’ve had a few thousand hits… wow!   So I decided to get back to blogging.  Thanks for reading.  :)

One thing this brown eyed girl has learned… is that you are never too old to learn anything.  AND just when you think you have it all figured out… uh oh.  That’s a sure sign you don’t!!   Don’t take ANYTHING for granted.  Especially your relationships.  Calm skies can turn into nightmarish tornadoes with no warning.  At least… no warnings that you really pay attention to.  I learned this the hard way.  And no, I am not talking about real tornadoes… although we sure have had enough of those!!   Speaking of… I want to convey my sincerest sympathies to those who have been affected by the deadly tornadoes lately.  My heart just goes out to you all.  :'(

Today it’s on my mind to talk a little about… relationships.  Of all sorts.  There is one deadly ingredient, that will choke any relationship quicker than anything.  That thing is… control.  It’s a nasty, 7-letter word, that is as sneaky as hell.  It hides in all kinds of disguises… love… concern… religion.  Those are the main three where it likes to rear its ugly head.  It slowly chokes you, and those around you… and by the time you wake up to see the damage… the storm has ripped through and you are left wondering what just happened.  Many times, those who are doing the controlling don’t even recognize it, because they have been slowly and silently controlled all their lives too.  It’s a vicious cycle.  It takes a major upheaval sometimes to give a wake up call.

So what do we do?  First of all… just STOP.  Stop trying to be God.  In effect, that’s what we do.  We think that if we don’t run things (which usually involves running PEOPLE, we just don’t look at it that deeply yet) who will?  SOMEBODY that knows what they’re doing has to tell all the good people what to do.  What to think.  What to believe.  When they’re right or wrong.  And as a devoutly religious person, I was really good at it.  I thought I was doing what was good for the people I love and only until much later did I realize I was doing just the opposite… turning them away.  My world crashed around me.  And I realized I had to do some soul searching on my own self.  I was so busy “condemning sin” and making sure everybody around me lived the right way… I didn’t even see it myself.  When I look back on things in the past in my relationships… I shudder.  I must have been so horrible to be around and I didn’t even know it.  And that led me to question some other things in my own belief system, and do some spring cleaning on my heart.  I needed to make some long overdue changes in my own life.

Control is something that we have no business messing with.  We want to control something?  We want to control someone?  Let’s focus on controlling ourselves!  And leave it there.  If we can keep our own self control then we’ll be doing great.  But controlling others… even subtle manipulations for “all the right reasons” … has to become a thing of the past.  And if you think about it.. it’s so stressful, worrying what everyone else is doing!  Just let it go.  You cannot imagine the feeling of freedom it brings, to not have to be in control of everything.  Let people police themselves.  If you’re worried about the state of their soul… well, you know what?  It’s their soul.  Not yours.  Let them deal with it in their own way… and you just worry about you.  That is a full time job… I know first hand.  My plate is full enough just dealing with my own life.

Today I am a new person.  I am a free spirit.  No one tells me what to believe, or do, or think… and I don’t tell anyone else.  I don’t follow the leader blindly… today, I am my own leader.   I follow no one… I lead no one.  But you are more than welcome to walk beside me.  I found out that the greatest gift you can give anyone is the gift of acceptance.  Everyone wants to know they are loved and accepted just as they are.  No matter what they watch… or do in their private time… or the words they speak… we all just want to be accepted and loved for who we are.  And if those closest to us can’t accept that… can’t accept us for who we are… then we have to make changes.  Hopefully if someone truly loves you, they will have their own awakening… do their own soul searching… and meet you where you are… but if that loved one is unable to accept the truth of who you are, of what you need for acceptance… then that needs to be addressed, and decisions need to be made.   But this must be discussed… don’t make the mistake of just thinking that person would not listen to you.  If they love you… they will listen.  Give them a chance to rise to the occasion before you make the choice to leave… and then take it from there.   I was fortunate, in that the one I love was able to talk with me, and we made some needed changes in acceptance and understanding, for both of us. After taking a long hard look at how I had made others feel… I understood their viewpoint… and I realized they needed a heartfelt apology from me too, not just them.  Yes they had made mistakes, but I had to acknowledge that so had I!  And how would I have felt in their shoes?  These are tough questions we have to ask ourselves, and they are not easy to look at, especially when we feel the answers present themselves to our heart.

I will never make the same  mistake again of thinking I have to control… on any level… what someone else does.  And I have to say that since we have come to that understanding.. we have both felt more liberated, at ease… and our relationship is the best it has ever been, in 13 years.  I will say, this is my marital relationship.  It’s like we are dating all over again… only better than it ever was.  The change has been unbelievable!  And I am grateful that we had that opportunity. I would recommend it to anyone.  A little love and acceptance goes a long way.  When there is love and acceptance, there is no longer room for control.  

There is a song by Meredith Brooks called “It Don’t Get Better” and the song asks this question:  “Do you want to be happy, or do you want to be right?”

You know what?  Heck with control…

I want to be happy.

And so… these are my deep thoughts this morning.

Have a great day!!  :)

Hugs to all of you…

Amy


Advertisements

Breaking Investigation Reveals Cows Milked for Land O’Lakes Die Slow, Painful Deaths

Standard

I received this disturbing information about suffering cows on a Pennsylvanian Land ‘O Lakes supplier/farm. Please take a moment to read this and think about the scenario. How would you feel? Please don’t say “It’s just a cow.” Every living thing has feelings, whether we choose to acknowledge the fact or not. How would we feel if someone bigger or more powerful than us took our freedoms away and let us suffer in pain needlessly….?  Words in red are emphasized by me.

Dear Amy,

A veterinarian who examined this weak, starving, dehydrated calf on the farm of a Land O’Lakes milk supplier found that his skin was scalded from the chronic coating of urine and feces. Learn more.

You probably recognize the name Land O’Lakes. You’ve seen the company’s butter and milk products lined up on grocery-store shelves, and you may even purchase its products for your family. Now, please consider the immense suffering of these cows―who are given little more than a numbered tag punched through their ears―documented by PETA during our new undercover investigation of a Land O’Lakes supplier.

On the supplier’s Pennsylvania farm, our investigation documented the suffering of cow #506, who gave birth after a nine-month pregnancy and then collapsed on April 11. A day later, she was found struggling outside without food, water, or shelter from freezing temperatures ―the flailing of her head had carved a small trench in the ground under her face. She was eventually shot and killed.

Cow #826 would not stand up when urged, prompting the farm’s co-owner to electro-shock her to her feet. Her condition continued to decline over the course of 21 days, until she was finally shot and killed. Like many other cows on this farm, she was not given veterinary care or put out of her misery in a timely manner. Instead, she was left to suffer for weeks.

While being milked by a machine, cow #36’s gangrenous, infected teat ruptured, and workers were told to “amputate” it by binding it with a tight elastic band. Her condition deteriorated over the course of 11 days, until she finally died.

These are the stories of just a few of the cows whose painful experiences our investigator documented on the farm of this Land O’Lakes supplier. Others suffered when their newborn calves were torn away from them shortly after birth or when their tails were tightly wrapped with elastic bands in order to “dock” them, and they were all forced to live in perpetually wet pens and sheds full of deep excrement, which leads to the spread of disease. Watch our investigation video to learn more.

This blatant disregard for animal welfare is routine in the dairy industry. Cows are kept constantly pregnant in order to make them continue to produce milk, and they are hooked up at least twice a day to machines that extract the milk intended for their own calves. When their exhausted bodies are “spent” and can no longer provide enough milk, they are sent to slaughter, usually for hamburger meat.

Please take just a few minutes right now to help cows like #506, #826, and #36 who are still suffering for Land O’Lakes products. Write to the company today. Demand that Land O’Lakes executives watch the horrific undercover investigative footage and adopt PETA’s 12-point animal welfare plan, which will eliminate some of the worst abuses of cows raised for milk. Of course, the best way for you to help prevent cows from enduring this type of abuse is to go vegan and stop consuming dairy foods. Explore our “Vegetarian Starter Kit” for recipes and tips and to get started today.

Thank you for speaking out for cows on dairy factory farms.

Very truly yours,

Ingrid E. Newkirk
President